The 2009 Mercury Grand Marquis is old, handles like the U.S.S. Nimitz and is outdone by a variety of equally large, safe and powerful competitors -- including Mercury's own Sable. Only those who yearn for 1970s-era land yachts need apply.
- Spacious interior with six-passenger capacity, comfy ride, low price, torque-rich V8, excellent crash scores.
- Ancient design and underpinnings, sloppy ride and handling, outpaced by newer competitors in almost every way, being flagged down by those in need of a taxi.