2011 Hyundai Equus Signature: Luxe Ambulance
September 15, 2011
I did that thing that a lot of us guys do when you start ticking off the years of your third decade: a seemingly innocuous awkward movement that generates a searing, blinding pain at the base of your spine, leaving you crumpled and broken for hours afterward. I'd love to attribute it to some kind of masculine effort around the house - shifting the fridge, moving heavy boxes out to the garage, reaching to rescue a litter of kittens from the cypress tree off the balcony.
It was nothing so much as a limp, white-collar injury sustained when leaning over at a bad angle to place my laptop manbag on the floor. Driving a hoppity new Z4 into the office was less enjoyable than it could've been (kind of sedate in first gear, but pretty great once the new turbo two-liter's rotating mass gets some legs under it), and after a day of moderating Advil intake, the Equus seemed like the only proper convalescence. The 212-way seat adjustments allowed me to practice the moves I will eventually master as an old man, complete with a string of expletives.
The massage feature sounded good at first, but its mechanical kneading - welcome on almost any other day - just amplified the pain. The heated feature was also nice until I realized my butt was on fire, while my spine was just warm. Still, I much appreciated the Equus' soft ride and the burly V8 that sped me quickly to a proper home remedy.
Dan Frio, Automotive Editor