2008 Audi R8: Unsafe and Insane R8 Admirers
July 09, 2008
OK, I get that the 2008 Audi R8 is a totally hot-looking car. Even as I saw it while sitting in another car caravaning behind it, I couldn't help but drool, and I've already ridden in it for over 1,000 miles. And I know that of course people are bound to be curious about it. You don't see many of these on the road. But we've encountered sooo many a-holes on the I-5 because of it. I'm talking people who are cutting off other motorists just to drive beside it, who tailgate us, who squat in our blindspots while on the highway so we can't switch lanes when we need to.
So I thought I'd create a wall of shame, if you will, of said motorists who gave me a glimpse of what it must be like to be a celebutard being hounded by paparazzi. These are only the worst of the offenders.
Jetta GLI driver on the way to Seattle: We encountered this douchebag on the I-5 after leaving Corvallis, Oregon. He just came out of nowhere at full speed and nearly rear-ended the other car in the lane beside us. He then cut us off, swinging past our front end pretty close. Basshole!
But that wasn't the end of it. He stayed in the left lane and then adjusted for a slow cruising speed. But every time we ended up in front of him, whether in another lane or in the left lane, here he'd come again, driving erratically and unsafely. We didn't know what to do. We couldn't get rid of him. He'd always drive just slow enough so we'd end up passing him and then would seem to get angry when we did.
Finally, when a long stretch of highway opened up before us, we accelerated deep into the triple digits (after we turned onto a closed track of course) putting a lot of distance between us and Le Douche. Unfortunately, before we could sigh with relief, here he was again, going full speed and aiming for our rear. Wtf? If he was in a sports car, I could sorta understand what he was getting at, but in a Jetta? So I turned around and shot a couple of pictures of him with my Canon G9 which I guess looks more official than a point and shoot because he veered off quickly to the right lane and took the next exit.
7 Series driver on the way to Eugene, Oregon: This guy with his wife and small daughter started off as an eager admirer of the R8, committing those offenses I had mentioned at the top of the post.
But then things inexplicably went in the other direction when, after pulling off on a closed track and flooring it to get away, the 7 Series driver came tearing out of the bank of cars behind us, gunning for us. I could see him from miles away dancing around the other cars as his bright xenons gave him away. He finally reached us and sat on our tail for miles even as we switched lanes.
So we tried another tactic and dropped our speed to 60 mph, a crawl in the 70-mph zone, especially in this car. He zoomed past us til he was a little bit ahead of us and then applied his brakes, trying to match our slowww speed. And then he blipped his windshield wipers so that the cleanser sprayed us. "I don't know if he did that on purpose," said Jay, "but I don't know what we did to anger him." "You think maybe it's because I took his picture?" I asked meekly. "Ohh yeahhh. Hm," he replied. We were finally able to get rid of him by exiting toward Eugene.
In any case, if you see our R8 on the road, it's OK to look and admire but please keep your eyes on the road, too.
Caroline Pardilla, Deputy Managing Editor