Yes, your dad is richer than Oprah. And yes, you look like a Laguna Beach cast member. But you really wish people would stop thinking you've got this, like, super-easy life.
You're a teen but you have pain. You have struggle. There's that time your stepmonster tried to crimp your fabulosity by putting you on this ridiculous 3 a.m. curfew. Fortunately, your dad divorced her soon after, putting an end to all that nonsense.
Which brings us to what is perhaps your biggest struggle of all: choosing which car you want your dad to get you for your My Super Sweet 16* birthday bash. Seems like everyone else always asks for a 3 Series. Big deal. You want something different, but what?
Fortunately, we've done the homework for you and picked the 10 rides we think will make your friends drool with envy. The prices are listed just so you know how much you need to "work" your dad:
BMW Z4, $45,676
You want that BMW badge but everyone always gets the entry-level 3 Series. Blow all those posers away with the ultimate BMW, a Bright Red Z4 roadster. Load it up with the $2,750 Premium package and an automatic folding soft top is yours for some instant top-down action. No need to lift a finger. Forget about the 3 Series where you'd have to drag all your friends around when you can have this exclusive club for two.
Lotus Elise, $46,270
Talk about attention-getting. Imagine the sheet being pulled off this ride during your birthday party. It's so different from anything you see on the road. Which color to get, though? An elegant Arctic Silver or an eyeball-searing Chrome Orange? Whatever the case, this is fun for those who know how to drive stick and want to show off their driving skills in one of the coolest British sports cars.
Mercedes-Benz SLK350, $47,400
You love the fact that Mercedes-Benz is, in many ways, the ultimate luxury car brand; there's something to be said for that sort of timeless cachet. An SLK350 Benz offers cachet and then some. This roadster will get you hot and bothered with its sleek looks, but it's more than just the automotive equivalent of Josh Hartnett — it also offers a stylish cabin and outstanding performance.
Hummer H2, $54,110
Everyone always rents the Hummer H2 limo. Do them one better by actually owning the H2. And should anyone get jealous of your rank and try and lash out, the Hummer will keep you protected; this sturdy tank was, after all, designed to be used by the military. Luxury features like satellite radio, heated seats and a rear-seat DVD player are available.
Audi RS 4, $66,000
Even if you're more inclined to take a trip to the mall than a spin through some curvy mountain roads, this Audi makes it look like you know a lot about cars and how to drive 'em. Just give these numbers to anyone who asks: "420 horsepower and 317 pound-feet of torque" — whether or not they know what that means — and bask in their jealousy. Silk napa leather on the seats and carbon-fiber trim accents everywhere in the cabin make sure this won't be mistaken by your friends for any ol' Audi.
Land Rover Range Rover Sport, $70,535
Not too many people know this about you, but you appreciate nature and stuff. You've even thought that someday, maybe, you'd like to go camping. That's why you'll like this sporty and supercharged Land Rover. With features like hill descent control and a four-wheel-drive system with customizable settings, the smallest and nimblest of the LR lineup is built to take you places where you can hear the pleasing crunch of gravel under your Uggs.
Jaguar XK-Series, $83,570
When you don't want just any car, the XK-Series won't disappoint you. One Super Sweet 16er convinced her daddy to get her the convertible in Salsa Red. She liked it for its looks but you'll luxuriate in its stylish leather- and wood-laden interior, along with must-have amenities like lambswool footwell rugs and fold-down picnic trays for your backseat buddies. Plus it's British. Classy!
Porsche Cayenne Turbo, $93,700
You don't mean to boast, but status and privilege have placed you in a position where you are indeed above it all. You'd probably enjoy choosing a ride that keeps you above it all as well — literally. The Porsche Cayenne Turbo not only shows its sporty and speedy capabilities to the world with that badge but its high seating position gives you a commanding view of the road and the freshman peons below.
Ferrari F430, $168,005
Sometimes you just wanna go, like, really fast and be all "Wheee!" For moments like that, there is the Ferrari F430. Equipped with 483 hp, this Italian stallion has the goods to get you from zero to 60 in less than 4.5 seconds. Of course it can also impress just by sitting in the parking lot or cruising the boulevard. The car is available as both a coupe and convertible, so top-down thrills are yours for the taking.
Bentley Continental GTC, $189,990
If you're really good at batting those lashes, maybe you can get away with asking for both a killer sweet 16 party and an ultraluxurious ride. There is no convertible more luxurious than the Bentley Continental GTC (heiress Paris only had the GT model); it's even got a heated steering wheel so you can keep your hands warm on those icy L.A. mornings. Best of all, a host of out-of-range exterior paint colors are offered, so you can make absolutely sure your Bentley looks different from Melissa's down the street.
* For all those who're clueless, My Super Sweet 16 is a program airing on MTV in which rich kids like you have a ridiculously decadent birthday bash thrown by their ridiculously wealthy parents where a ridiculously expensive car is unveiled as their first ride.
To find a dealership that knows how to treat shoppers right, please visit Edmunds.com's Dealer Ratings and Reviews.